The Story Of Us - Jones Lesley - Страница 62
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“I can stay for a couple of hours.” He didn’t acknowledge my reply so I went and sat on the bed next to Cam. “Right Ben, I’ll arrange a cleaner to come through, but for now, can you just check all the cupboards and drawers in here and in the bathroom, anywhere he might stash gear or booze. I’ll get someone over to put some locks on the door and we’ll work out shifts between me, Josh and Tory to watch him. He hated rehab, we haven’t left it so long this time so what I’m thinking is we get a doctor over here to check him out and if it’s okay, we do his detox and rehab from here.”
Benny nods in agreement. “Good, that’s good Rob, you‘re right, he hated rehab, it’ll kill him if he goes back there.”
“I don’t understand this, is Cam an alcoholic or a junky or both?” Robbie’s whole demeanour changes as he comes and sits down on the bed and looks down at Cam.
“Not really, I don’t know, I’m not a professional, Cam usually stays away from drugs, but he does do the odd line of Charlie and he likes a drink as much as the next bloke but he always knows when to say enough’s enough, apart from when he’s not coping. When he’s not coping he uses them to escape, he loses himself in a bottle and when that’s not enough he makes himself feel like he can deal with anything by snorting line after line of coke and that’s what he’s doing now.” His gaze turns to me and he looks me over, like he’s seeing me for the first time.
“I’m sorry alright, about what I said, he told me you had never said that you loved him, he told me you had admitted from the start that you were in love with someone else. He just didn’t expect you to get back with the other bloke.”
“Neither did I,” I say quietly. “I never wanted to hurt him, I wanted to tell him to his face about Sean, but he went to Amsterdam and I arranged to see him when he got back so that I could tell him to his face but he came home early and…” I close my eyes as I think about Cam’s words.
“Thanks Kitten, thanks a lot.” The look in his eyes when he realised who Sean was. I start to cry.
“He turned up at the club and I was there with Sean and I never meant to hurt him, I am so sorry, I haven’t stopped thinking about him for the past two weeks. I just don’t know, I don’t understand what’s going on with me. I think he might be right, I think I do love him, I think, I don’t know.”
Robbie looks at me with eyes so much like Cam’s. “Well that’s something only you can decide Georgia and until that time please don’t go getting my brothers hopes up, because if you decide that you’re wrong or if you leave him again, then I think that would actually kill him.”
I have no reply, I don’t know what to think, I don’t know what to feel. I’m left alone with Cam as what can only be described as a military operation goes on around him, his flat is cleaned, bolts and locks are put on the bedroom door. Benny comes in and goes through every draw and cupboard in the bedroom and bathroom, all while Cam sleeps. I’ve noticed beads of sweat are starting to appear on his forehead and top lip so I go into the bathroom and run a face cloth under the cold tap and come back and wipe his face, he stirs and mumbles but doesn’t wake so I go out to the kitchen to fetch a bowl that I can fill with water so that I don’t have to keep dripping the face cloth from the bathroom. The whole place is now spotless and smells fresh and clean. Robbie is still here, talking on the phone, Benny and another bouncer from the bar are sitting on stools in the kitchen, eating burgers. My belly rumbles because I’ve not eaten today.
“What time is it Ben?”
He looks at his watch. “Ten past six.” Shit, I’ve been here since twelve, I need to get home.
“Ben look, Cam’s starting to sweat, I’m gonna give his face another wipe, then would you take me home, I can’t walk, I have the press up my arse at the moment.” Robbie has ended his phone call and is looking at me.
“Go wash his face and I’ll take you. The doctor will be here to give him something for the sweats and shakes.” I nod, then fill the bowl with cold water and go back to the bedroom.
This time when I wash Cam’s face he opens his eyes, they are a lot more focused now and he looks over my face as he licks his lips, which are dry and cracked. “Kitten,” he whispers in a croaky voice.
“Would you like some water?”
I ask him, he shakes his head. “Scotch.”
I give a little laugh and shake my head. “No can do Tiger, water, tea, coffee, them’s your choices?”
“You’re mean.”
“I know.”
“I love you.”
“I know.”
“Do you?”
“Yes, would you like some water or some tea?” My heart is banging so hard in my chest that it’s giving me a headache.
He sighs. “Will you serve it to me naked?”
“I’ll pour it over your dick if you don’t simmer down.” He gives a little chuckle.
“There’s my angry Kitten.”
“I’m not angry Cam, I’m sad. Why? Why did you do this to yourself?”
He closes his eyes, when he opens them, his look is cold and hard and it scares me for a second. “My head hurts, would you please get me some headache tablets and a glass of water?”
I don’t question his change in tone or the way he’s now looking at me, he’s hurt and he’s angry and I’m the cause of his suffering. I think that entitles him to look at me however he likes. “I can get you some water but no tablets, the doctor will be here soon and I’m not sure what he wants to give you.”
“What doctor, why?” He starts to get up out of bed but his legs are unsteady and he stagers and falls back down, I call out for Benny, but it’s Robbie that’s first through the door.
“Back in bed Cam.”
“You’re not locking me up again; I’m not going back to that place!” Cam’s shouting and Robbie’s trying to get him back into bed, Benny comes in and helps to hold him down.
“Don’t hurt him,” I shout at both of them.
“Get her out!” Cam growls. “Get her the fuck out of here, don’t let her see me, Rob, don’t let her see me like this.”
He starts to sob, and I start to cry. “Please Rob, please don’t lock me up.”
Robbie holds onto Cam as he sobs. “I won’t mate, I promise I won’t, the doctor’s coming. Joshie and Tor are on their way. We’ll look after you here, I won’t lock you up, and we’ll get you better between us.”
Cam stops fighting and just lets his big brother hold him, while I stand in the corner and cry, as I watch the outcome of my actions unfold. Robbie looks at me and gestures with his head for me to get out. I leave, I don’t wait for a lift, I leave the flat and make the ten minute walk back home with my head down and hope that no one recognises me; as I come down the back ally, I spot Sean’s, Len’s and my Dad’s cars all blocking my way. Fuck, I’m in trouble.
Dave is standing at the bottom of the stairs and lets out sigh and then shakes his head as he sees me. “Thanks Georgia, I’m in so much fuckin’ trouble coz of you.” For fucks sake.
“I’m sorry Dave, but if it’s any consolation, I bet I’m in more.”
He nods his head. “I think your right there babe, Maca is doing his narna, I think they were about to call the Police.” Shit, fuck, bollocks.
I run up the stairs and down the hallway to a welcoming party of my entire family plus Jimmie, Ash, Sean and Milo, the whole room falls absolutely silent for a split second. Sean has his back to me; he turns, looks me over, puts his hands on his hips and lets out the biggest sigh as his chin falls forward onto his chest.
“Where the fuck have you been George?” Bailey speaks first, my Dad rakes his hand through his hair and comes and gives me a cuddle.
“Princess, you scared the fuckin’ life outta me, don’t ever, ever do that again!”
I swallow. “I’m sorry Daddy.” I look around the room at all the anxious faces, Baileys making a call.
“Fin, she’s here, call the boys off… Na, she’s fine, I’ll bell ya later and let ya know, cheers.” His angry eyes look me over.
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